I Want to Live, I Want to Give

I have been thinking a lot about what my next step should be and about our project in Catemu. It has been really hard building that house, but it really is one of the best things I have ever decided to do.

On Saturday we had our roof raising, los tijerales as they are called in Chile (Christian has the pictures so I will put them up tomorrow). I caved and invited all the big important people I didn´t want to invite. Guess what, they didn´t come. They didn´t come because we didn´t have the party for publicity, we aren´t a big company that can help them with campaign funds, we are just two young people that decided to build a house for a family with our friends and people who cared enough to donate, and really that is all I wanted this project to be. I didn´t want it to be a stepping stone for my business, I didn´t want to be famous or make money, I just wanted to help.

A few days ago a local paper wrote an article about me that I didn´t know about. A neighbor of the Catemu site called paper and told them about our project and about me personally. I can´t find the article, so I haven’t read it, but people in the Catemu tell me that it basically says that a girl that looks like she is 15 years old (that´s me) is building this house with her bare hands and that more people should be like her. When I heard that, I couldn´t help but wonder if I was really that person and if I was, would I still be her if I the owner of big company. I am afraid the answer would be no, and I don´t want to stick around to find out. I know a lot of people do really great things with their money, and being rich isn´t bad. It is really special when people use their hard earned cash to do good.

I didn´t want anyone to think that my last post was saying rich people are bad and going to hell because of the biblical passage I included yesterday. I don´t believe that at all. What I was saying (confessing really and on the internet no less) that I am a little ashamed of myself (ok more than just a little). The we got a little money and fame I got so caught up in maintaining it that my husband and I sacrificed our health, our marriage and our happiness, and it took one dead friend and another friend in a medically induced coma to make us realize that it isn´t worth it. That is why I included that particular passage.

So what does this mean for the Catemu project (and my life in general)? It means that Christian and I are getting back to the original plan. We are going to slow down, we are going to finish the house together as we always planned to do. He is quitting his job, and we are going to work together and actually enjoy construction like we did when we first started. Then I am coming home with a clear conscience, knowing that I started this project and finished it for all the right reasons, and I am bringing him with me.